Saturday, May 05, 2007

Screw diabetes! I want dessert!

It's 5 pm now, I just took my blood sugar, it's 104.

That's right, 104. After a big lunch at Ipanema only 3 hours ago.

However, when I wake up tomorrow morning after fasting all night, my blood sugar is going to be 115.

Raise your hand if you're confused.

I feel like going out and having cake, caked soaked in liqueur, topped with fruit in a sugary sauce. Coffee with two sugars. And a cigarette.

I've made a decision: I don't have diabetes! Not during the day, at least. I have what's called nocturnal mystery diabetes. And it is widely know that people with nocturnal mystery diabetes can eat all the sugary desserts they want.

Maybe I should stop watching cooking shows.


Orange said...

I'll bet it just takes a while for the food you eat to make it from the stomach into the other innards and for your body to extract the sugars and release them into your bloodstream. So maybe when your blood sugar's lower, your small-intestinal sugar is higher, pending further processing?

I'm totally guessing here.

john patrick said...


Or maybe some living goo has fallen from space and integrated itself into my spidey suit, turning it black and amplifying my dorkiness.

Oh, sorry, that's why we hate Spiderman 3.