I have a very dorky story to tell.

It was 8pm, which was the time I had set aside to grade. Then "Do You Speak American" came on, and I had to watch that of course, being a former linguist. The host of the show had promised a linguistic road trip through America, but unfortunatly the 'linguistics' part of it ended up being very pedestrian and the 'road trip' part was overemphasized. 30% of this documentary must have been music dubbed in as the dude walked into the shot and onto a train, or drove past a river or whatever. He managed to talk about the Boston, Philidelphia, and Pittsburg dialects without actually providing audio examples.

I'm not going to list my complaints of this show, because it would be too long and dorky. So regardless, I noticed it was already 9pm, and the documentary showed no signs of quitting. So then I had to watch West Wing, with "Do You Speak American" during the commercials, which were more substancial than I expected. No problem, I thought, I'll grade papers at 10.

Well, 10pm rolled around, and wouldn't you know it, "Do You Speak American" is a 3 hour tour. A three hour tour. It's not even that good, but of course I'm watching it. How often do you get to watch a special about regional and cultural dialectology in the US?

So I watched it, dammit, and now it's 11 and I'm going to bed. They'll get their papers back on Friday. Get off my back.

So kids take money to school for lunch, and then they have change. So then I come up to them with a jar marked "tsunami relief" and within 45 minutes I've collected over $70 for the Jesuit Relief Services. It's sick, kiddies, this jar is packed with money for the poor and broken hearted. So I'm on my way back to the office and this woman criticizes me, saying I'm no different from a bum on the street corner.

It's time once again to look at our mission statement and our core values, everyone.