Hey everybody, I'm watching the US Women's Figure Skating championship. Why? Because it's not grading. That's why.

Sasha Cohen just fell on her butt; then she did a layback spin the axis of which was one of her boobs, and you could see it rotate. The girl has got some crazy spins and spirals, which is fine with me, because during all the footwork they've got this crazy pigeon cam that rotates around the rink opposite of the skater. Technologically it's very cool, but in practice it makes me seasick.

Michelle Kwan is next. Skating is wierd; when they really like you, they throw stuff on the ground. Hmph.

So I went to the big house warming party; they are nice people and I think they are going to be a good influence on the hoa. They served fondu, which is delicious and fun, but it remains a little foreign to me. I do see the advantage; prep everything before hand, and it takes care of itself. I do, however, think it's more effective as a multi-course casual sit down meal, you know, like up in your alpine lodge with all your teutonic, sweater-wearing friends--and less effective as a stand up american buffet table graze.

Here's some pointers for our buffet-loving readers:

1) The buffet table's natual enemy is the WALL. Get your buffet table away from the damn wall. Pull the table away from the wall, and you double your the space from your serving area.

2) The buffet table's toxic friend: the long line! It makes your food and your guests wait for each other unnecessarily. Fix: instead of one buffet table with massive amounts of food, have multiple buffet tables with all the same food. Downside: you have to work a little more to keep food on the table. Upside: more access = less time for people in line.

3) Advanced buffet theory: use round tables. People won't know where to start, or where to line up. But multiple tables will reduce the number of people waiting at each buffet table, so with round tables people will go directly to their food instead of waiting in line for it. And since they won't be following a series per se, they will effectively be hunting and gathering for their food. Instead of the cafeteria metaphor, going to my round tables buffet would be more like SHOPPING.

That said, my neighbors' fondu buffet was lovely. There was both chese (bread and veggies) and chocolate (cookies, cake, and fruit). And lots of wine!

La folle qui habite dans le numero deux est arrive. Ni moi ni la presidente lui avons dite bonsoir. J'ai essaye de lui dire bonjour, mais elle m'ignorait. Tant mieux.